Me and you and you and me

For the past couple months, I have been listening to the song “Communion” by Maverick City on repeat. Whenever I am doing my personal prayer or sitting in adoration, I am always finding myself listening to the song. I resonate so much with the lyrics especially where it reiterates these three words, “Me and you and you and me”. It speaks to me so much about my relationship with the Son of GOD, Jesus Christ this past year. We should always have that desire to be in communion with Him. There is a church here in Philly that I love going to for Thursday night adoration because it’s the time and place that I feel closest to GOD. It reminds me how Jesus was praying in the Garden of Gethsemane amidst the darkness in the woods on the night of his arrest. Even though Jesus foreseen that one of His apostles, Judas, would betray Him in a few hours, He chose to devote all the time and energy he had left to intimate prayer instead. Similarly, when I sit in front of the Blessed Sacrament that represents the Body and Blood of Christ, I am “taken back to the garden” because I want to let the LORD into each dark corner of my life.

I recently attended an advent retreat, and it was enlightening because it allowed me to reflect upon this past year. In one of the talks, the priest brought up the whole notion of gaze and how that is a foundation of any relationship. Most importantly, our relationship with Christ. Back in Genesis of the Old Testament, Adam and Eve hid themselves from GOD behind the bush because they were afraid after violating His WORD. They covered themselves with garments made of fig leaves to cover their nakedness from GOD. However, Adam’s sense of nakedness stems from his shame of disobedience and fear of GOD which He was able to see through. In fact, we are no different than Adam and Eve because even if we try to clothe ourselves from the habitual sins, no mask can hide us from GOD. HE does not define us by our sins, and he forgives us simply from our willingness to gaze upon HIM and repent for our sins.

I remember when I first held my niece when she was only a few weeks old in my arms. I couldn’t take my eyes off her and gaze upon the beauty of her face. The Lord desires for us to look at him in the same awe-like manner and embrace him. Like how David wrote in Psalm 27:4 “One things have I asked of the LORD, that will I seek after: that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the LORD and to inquire in his temple. In John 12, Mary of Bethany anoints Jesus’s feet with oil and wipes them with her hair. There was another time in Luke 10, we see her listening to Jesus’s teaching. In both times, it’s striking that Mary simply sits with Jesus in a unhurried fashion and finds so much genuine joy in HIS presence. Even when Judas criticized her for anointing Jesus’s feet, Mary ignored all the outside noise and beheld HIS glory as though time stands still. And Jesus only defended Mary quoting that, “You will always have the poor among you, but you will not always have me” (John 12:8). This is the same delight and joy that we should strive to have when we sit in HIS presence. Regardless of our burdens from our sins, we should open ourselves to HIS peace and guidance so we can redirect our minds to GOD.

Through the sacrament of baptism, we become partakers of divine mercy. So even throughout our lives today, God continues to reveal himself through our personal history and consoles us in our humiliation, rejection and heartbreak because he went through the same emotions and still does to this day. God provides us with divine mercy and love because of the relationship we have with him as our Heavenly Father. It’s amazing to see the relationship between my older brother and his two-year child and how it evolves over time. To how much joy and delight he had when my niece was born, when she took her first steps and when she said Mamma and Dadda. It’s very clear to see the amount of love a father has for a child from the very beginning. Similarly, the Lord who created us in his image, according to his likeness and who knew us even before we were born provides us that father and child love and affection. When we start to realize the intensity to how much the LORD loves each one of us, our relationship with HIM will never be the same.

“Cause you are closer, closer than my skin. You are in the air I’m breathing in”

I love this acoustic version of the song ❤️

Taking the long way home

After a stressful few months earlier this year, I aimed to transition back to my healthy routine by signing up for a 5K with my friends this past summer. And honestly, I was more motivated after the race to reinstate my lifestyle. During my freshman year of college, I adapted unhealthy eating habits which gradually led to changes in my appearance. While pulling several all-nighters and binge eating, I failed to realize I was neglecting my overall well-being. Amid the uncontrolled stress levels, I tried to find solace in food. Long after I realized my physical appearance was changing, I wanted to fix it by taking the shortcut. I put myself through a rigid diet plan and workout schedule to lose the extra weight. My friends often ridiculed the way I was constantly restricting myself, and I was in denial by reassuring myself that I was doing what was optimum for my body. As a result, I was only able to maintain this lifestyle for five months until I hit the plateau phase, and I relapsed by regaining all the weight the following semester.

Over the years, I learned ways to manage my fitness and food habits without sabotaging my mental health. For almost three years now, I follow intermittent fasting that helps me to manage my weight, curb my cravings, enhance my productivity and mental clarity. My weekly runs are what paved a path for me to foster an holistic lifestyle. I have been running for two years now, and it has added a new dimension to my life, giving me a profound sense of freedom, taught me to be more resilient. And importantly, it taught me to persevere despite my drawbacks and failures in my personal and professional life. I no longer deprive myself of eating to lose those inches around the waist, nor I am bothered about the stretch marks, but I am more self-aware of how to be my own architect of my health and body fitness. In many aspects, running has definitely helped me to achieve that positive mindset. Particularly at a time when we are nowhere near the end of this pandemic, it’s so critical to keep in mind that the human body is our responsibility. We need to treat it well with a nutritious diet and plenty of exercise; and in return, it will reward you with rich health.

Passion

There is nothing inspiring about perfection. But there is everything inspiring about passion. It’s that passion what draws us to other people. When you embody such a strong emotion that sets your soul on fire, you grow more closer to the ones who give off that energy. Look to the sea for your own reflection, but do not focus on your imperfection. Our time here is much too brief to ponder on such trivial grief. Walk your life without any fear and nurture your precious aspirations.

Focus on the infinite and everything that is contained within. Focus on a border view of reality and what ultimately it is. In a constant state of evolving, we become more than what we were yesterday. For what was lost in the hustle might shine somewhere far away. Always strive for the better and there will always be something far greater than what we think.